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wow, I completely agree. I think I chimed in on that American Virgin post, too, and i do hold to alot of your beliefs too, Verie, and I’m also waiting for marriage. Just because I’ve never had sex doesn’t mean I cannot tell how powerful it is. I too, have seen friends stick with terrible guys because he’s her first. I’ve seen them panic over missed periods, gain weight due to birth control, and have to go to the doctor for an std test.
And, thankfully, I deal with none of that.
I also agree with the lack of deep seated issues. I’ve never been abused, have no disorders,etc. I see it as different from my religion, and i do not believe that god would judge anyone for having any sort of consenting, of age sex, whether that’s homosexual, premartial, sex or two old people getting frisky ;) .
I also know that I’m very emotional, and bond closely with my friends. To lose the one that I first became that physically close to, I really think, would devastate me. So, it goes back to Verie’s point about wanting to experience that bond with someone you really love.
I also, do not pin a scarlet letter on myself. In fact, accroding to two dear (and man-whoreish) friends of mine, they were certain that if any of my female group wasn’t a virgin, it would have been me. I love life, and parties, and i’m comfortable with all guys (perhaps because I’ve never slept with, and therefore never been utterly broken by the loss of one)
If the topic does come up, I do have to be very careful, because I honestly feel like my female friends judge me when the topic comes up. One told me I had to refer to myself as a girl, and not a woman. Another one told me I was denying myself my female rights, and behaving like a caged in, unliberated Victorian woman.
I don’t see myself that way. If we define womanhood by when we have sex, that means we’re still allowing man (or his penis) to chose when we are grownup. I also see myself as liberated, because I made my CHOICE. No one made it for me.